Workshop 18, 27/5 12:45-14:00

Elisabeth Heismann and four mothers from the Mother-support-group from Oxleas NHS Foundation Trust London

Reparing Relationships through Trauma Work

This workshop will demonstrate how parents from a specialist NVR Group/Gangs and CSE have been helped to recognise how feelings of shame, guilt and loss have prevented them from effective parenting. Through the process of developing empathy and forgiveness for themselves they were enabled to understand their child’s difficulties and to write and deliver an effective announcement, thereby increasing their parental presence.

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Workshop 19, 26/5 13:00-14:15

Idan Amiel - Can we repair instead of punish?

Reparation Acts as an NVR tool in cases of "explosive" youth & children

Abstract:

We all know that toddlers (usually by age 2) tend to have temper tantrums when they are frustrated - this phenomena was also termed the "terrible two". Most of the kids pass this phase, but some of them, according to parents' report never end it... When those kids grow up, the temper tantrums turn into "explosions" that might include aggression and violent acts towards others. In the lecture we will demonstrate and understand the reasons for these phenomena, specifically from the child's point of view. We will understand why when care givers are trying to set limits or react with rewards and punishments; they are going the wrong way.

Reparation acts are a valuable alternative to rewards and punishments in confronting those children's behavior. Through case examples we will present reparation acts as a prominent act that demonstrates the uniqueness of the NVR in front of violence. Reparation acts enables care givers, as well as teachers, to respond in a much better way in front of the "explosions" and stop the vicious cycle of escalation. More than that, we will understand how those acts enable the child to undergo a process of reintegration in the community from which he separated himself by the violent act.

Idan Amiel

Clinical psychologist and director of the parents' counseling clinic at Schneider Medical Center in Israel. Over the last 15 years he has been a key professional in developing the concepts of NVR and New Authority side by side with prof. Haim Omer. He leads now the New Authority Center team in Israel and most of his time is dedicated for promoting and expanding the principles of the New Authority concept both in Israel and Europe.